Many recently bereaved persons experience vivid and deeply meaningful dreams featuring the presence of the deceased that may reflect and impact their process of mourning.
Several surveys have provided evidence that dreams of deceased loved ones are very common amongst the bereaved, and that many bereaved people consider their dreams to be important features of their bereavement.
One study carried out in 2014, found that most dreams of the deceased featured pleasant past memories or experiences. Other common categories of dreams of the deceased included:
- The deceased free of illness.
- Memories of the deceased’s illness or time of death.
- The deceased in the afterlife appearing comfortable and at peace.
- The deceased communicating a message.
Most respondents in this study who dreamed of the deceased felt that this experience impacted the emotions related to their bereavement process and reported an increase in certain emotions and attitudes (e.g., acceptance of death, comfort, spirituality, sadness, quality of life).
Some reported that their dreams helped them accept the death of a loved one. For example, one participant wrote ‘‘[the dream] put my mind at peace about my brother’s death. I miss him very much but I know he is in God’s hands and happy.’’ Others described how their dreams helped them to retain a connection with the deceased: ‘‘I feel closer to mom than at the time of her death. At the time I felt cut off. Now feel as if I was reconnected in at least a small way.’’ Some explained how their dreams intensified their feelings of sadness: ‘‘My sister and I cared for our mother around the clock. The dreams just make me sadder and I miss her when I wake up.’’
The study concluded that dreams of the bereaved have an inherent therapeutic or healing quality and serve to maintain a connection with the deceased during the bereavement process. This therefore suggests that dreams of the deceased deserve increased attention from counsellors during bereavement counselling.
References:
A full list of references is available in the Reference Material section.
- Klugman C.M. (2006) Dead men talking: evidence of post death contact and continuing bonds. Omega: Journal of Death and Dying, 53 (3).
- Wright, S. T., Kerr, C. W., Doroszczuk, N. M., Kuszczak, S. M., Hang, P. C. and Luczkiewicz, D. L. (2014) The impact of dreams of the deceased on bereavement: a survey of hospice caregivers. American Journal of Hospice and Palliative Care, 31 (2).
