In conjunction with contemporary theories of grief and bereavement, Death-Bed Visions, Death-Bed Coincidences and After-Death Communication Experiences may play a part in grief and bereavement counselling.
It is estimated that 50% to 60% of people who are conscious before dying experience Death-Bed Visions (DBVs) (Mazzarino-Willett, 2010); that 50% of professional carers (e.g. nurses, auxiliary staff, and chaplains) have reported witnessing a Death Bed Coincidence (DBCs) (Fenwick, 2013); and that 75% of people experience an After-Death Communication (ADC) within one year of a bereavement, with 33% reporting an ADC occurring at some point in their life (Streit-Horn, 2011).
A person who has been told by a dying person of a DBV or they themselves have experienced a DBC or ADC may view the experience as spiritual (Rominger, 2013). They are often convinced by their experience that consciousness continues beyond death, and that they will eventually be reunited with their departed loved ones (McCormick & Tassell-Matamua, 2016; Shared Crossing Research Initiative, 2022).
Given how common these experiences are, a bereaved person may raise their experience for discussion during grief and bereavement counselling to try and resolve three questions:
- Where do I go from here?
- What will I do with my experience?
- How will I use what I have learned? (LaGrand, 2005)
Meaning making of the experience for a bereaved client in a way that facilitates client growth through integration of the experience is therefore an important part of the counselling process. Contemporary theories of grief and bereavement could be used a basis to develop a model of how DBVs, DBCs and ADC may play a role in bereavement counselling and grief resolution.
Through a continuing bond with the deceased person (Silverman & Klass, 1996), attachment theory (Bowlby, 1997) suggests that a bereaved person’s life can become overwhelmed by the loss of an attachment figure through their bereavement that results in an ongoing state of separation distress for them. To reduce this separation distress, it can lead to a yearning to search for the deceased person in attempts to re-establish the closeness they once had by looking for answers to the following questions:
- About their own life: How do I continue without them?
- About the person who has died: Where have they gone and how are they?
- About their relationship with the person who has died: Will I be with them again? (Holden, 2012)
The meaning-making theory of grief (Neimeyer et al., 2010) indicates that search for meaning is common after a bereavement so that grief becomes about acknowledging and reintegrating a relationship with a deceased individual into a new life narrative. Bereavement thereby becomes an active, ongoing, and alternating process of reaction, reconstruction, and reorientation. The dual-process model of coping (Stroebe & Schut, 1999) helps explain this oscillatory nature of grief by which those who grieve alternate between confronting and avoiding feelings associated with the loss.
DBVs, DBCs and ADC phenomena experiences indicate a temporary separation for the bereaved person from the deceased as the deceased exist somewhere, are well, and that they will meet them again. Making personal meaning of a DBV, DBC or ADC experience during grief and bereavement counselling can therefore become significant moments for a bereaved person which may help in reducing separation distress, give comfort, and makes living easier. This can lead to post-traumatic growth (Broden & Uveges, 2018) for a bereaved person, characterised by a positive personal transformation after a death.
References:
Bowlby, J. (1997). Attachment – Attachment and Loss: Volume 1. Pimlico.
Broden, E. G., & Uveges, M. K. (2018, 2018). Applications of Grief and Bereavement Theory for Critical Care Nurses. AACN Adv Crit Care, 29(3), 354-359.
Fenwick, P. (2013). End of Life Experiences – A Spiritual Perspective. Retrieved January 16th from https://youtu.be/UP9lM82F_Tc
Holden, J. M. (2012). The Role of Near-Death Experiences, Deathbed Visions, and After-Death Communication in Grief and Grief Counselling Retrieved November 7th from
https://youtu.be/tjo9qbQA_Qg
LaGrand, L. E. (2005). The Nature and Therapeutic Implications of the Extraordinary Experiences of the Bereaved. Journal of Near-Death Studies, 24(1), 3-19.
Mazzarino-Willett, A. (2010). Deathbed phenomena: its role in peaceful death and terminal restlessness. Am J Hosp Palliat Care, 27(2), 127-133.
McCormick, B. M. E., & Tassell-Matamua, N. (2016). After-Death Communication: A Typology of Therapeutic Benefits. Journal of Near-Death Studies, 34(3), 151-172.
Neimeyer, R. A., Burke, L. A., Mackay, M. M., & van Dyke Stringer, J. G. (2010). Grief Therapy and the Reconstruction of Meaning: From Principles to Practice. Journal of Contemporary Psychotherapy, 40(2), 73-83.
Rominger, R. (2013). Integration of Spiritually Transformative Experiences – Models, Methods, and Research. Journal of Near-Death Studies, 31(3), 135-150.
Shared Crossing Research Initiative. (2022). The Spectrum of End-of-Life Experiences: A Tool for Advancing Death Education. Omega (Westport), 0, 1-21.
Silverman, P. R., & Klass, D. (1996). Introduction: What’s the problem? . In D. Klass, P. R. Silverman, & S. L. Nickman (Eds.), Continuing bonds. New Understandings of Grief. (pp. 1-23). Taylor and Francis.
Streit-Horn, J. (2011). A Systematic Review of Research on After-Death Communication. University of North Texas. Denton, Texas.
Stroebe, M. S., & Schut, H. (1999). The dual process model of coping with bereavement – rationale and description. Death Studies, 23, 197-224.
