An in-depth investigation of bereaved clients identified a range of helpful aspects of bereavement counselling:
- The skilled listening of a counsellor: Participants spoke about how important it was that the counsellor be attentive and listening. They valued the counsellor’s way of being as kind, warm, down to earth and easy to talk to which helped them to feel at ease, and consequently better able to open up and relate. Participants also said that it was helpful to know that the counsellors were competent and confident in what they were doing.
- Being able to take a lead in the therapeutic work: Participants said that it was helpful that the counsellor allowed them to speak about about a range of issues other than grief. They spoke about the beneficial aspects of being able to lead the process, both in terms of what they spoke about from minute to minute but also from week to week. This was particularly beneficial when they were having a difficult week.
- Having their unhelpful thinking challenged: Participants said that this allowed them to look at things differently from a widened perspective, especially when working through difficult feelings such as guilt and anger.
- Having their responses to bereavement normalised: Participants spoke about the normalising effects of being educated about the grieving process and found it helpful to talk about the whole grief process rather than just what they were feeling at that moment. Participants mentioned that they found it helpful that the counsellor shared something about their own experiences of loss and the normalising effect of this. They also said that it made the counsellor seem more authentic and genuine.
- They valued the neutrality and independence of the counsellor: Participants spoke about how helpful it was that the counsellor was uninvolved with the family and did not know the person who had died.
References:
A full list of references is available in the Reference Material section.
- Lendrum, S. and Syme, G. (2004) Gift of Tears: A Practical Approach to Loss and Bereavement in Counselling and Psychotherapy. 2nd ed. Hove: Routledge.
- Simonsen, G, and Cooper, M. (2015). Helpful aspects of bereavement counselling: An interpretative phenomenological analysis. Counselling and Psychotherapy Research, June 2015, 15(2).
- van Deurzen, E. (2002) Existential Counselling and Psychotherapy in Practice. London: Sage publications.
